Let's harass local businesses.

Hello,

Sorry I haven't updated this blog for nearly a month, but I am dreadfully lazy. I'll try harder in future, honest.

I've just emailed a cleaning company in London. Why? Because I thought of a stupid joke connected to their name and I thought I might share it with them. This is what I sent them:

"Hi,

I've noticed your plughole covers in various urinals in London pubs, and felt compelled to contact you.

Do you already have an advertising slogan? Cos if you don't might I suggest one? Might I suggest: 'Do you feel mucky, punk?'

Pretty good, eh? You can have that one.

Enjoy your day,

Stephen"

Now, I'd be the first to admit that that's a shit joke. But when considered in the context thus demonstrated, it becomes funny, dun't it? Well, maybe. It'll become exponentially funnier should I receive a reply, and so forth should I reply in a similar tone, and so on and so forth, for about three or four exchanges, whereupon the law of diminishing returns decress that value-for-money shall drop off unless I'm able to get them into an argument or something.

Oh, I've got something funny to tell you about this email I once got that was meant for someone else, but I'll tell you that one another time.

I shall post Dirty Harry's response as soon as I get it.

Until then, I shall leave you with this:

Today sees the start of the enquiry into the Britons killed in the tsunami. 'There's a lot of questions that the families of victims want answering,' said a BBC journalist this morning. That's fair enough, but I'm pretty sure that in 99% of cases, the answer is going to be 'a big fucking tidal wave'. Are taxpayers footing the bill for this?

S